15. SHELAC.

It's a manicure that lasts for 14 days. Do I really need to say anything else?



Ok, fine, I will. I swear Shelac is not paying my rent or anything, but they should for the ammount of free advertising I provide them with. A co-worker of mine (and former beautician) got a "two-week manicure" for her wedding, and when she got back from her honeymoon they were still on...and beautiful!! It's not fake nails, it's literally just nail-polish. It's applied in layers and UV-light cured to make it set, and while it a but thicker than traditional nail polish, it still feels natural. I've been a devotee since she told me about them, and while I have gone to several locations and made some mistakes, it's still something I feel is worth spending money on.

I normally just get a neutral shade, but it helps my nails grow out and look oh-so-fabulouso whilst doing so. This is the first time I've enjoyed color on my nails; I used to think it was pointless to paint your fingernails since it chipped so quickly, but now I see the allure.



This is a highly suggest, if you have the cash. It runs about $30-$35 for the first time, then if you maintain a semi-regular schedule it's $25 to get them re-done. And Shelac, I accept cash or credit, thank you.

15. THIS PRETTY BEAUTY TREAT LETS ME BE MY MESSY, ACCIDENT-PRONE SELF WITHOUT WORRYING I'LL WRECK MY MANICURE AND WASTE MY MONEY.

14. PORCELAIN PRIDE.

I have it.

Yes, reader(s?), I have returned. Not on my beloved list of things is being task-oriented, or following-through. But it is on a list of wants or aspirations. Also on that list is a 10K, but I DO believe in miracles!



So, back to my porcelain pride: I, as you may have gathered, am quite the fair-skinned lady. Being of mostly Scandinavian descent, after logging some solar time my skin turns a pleasant shade of pink before it peels off to reveal a shiny, blindingly white layer of Irish-Girl-Alabaster. It wasn't always like this! I use to be just another sun-streaked, dirty-tan swimmer, proudly wearing my x-marks-the spot-tan-lines earned from 2 practices a day. But after a brief prom-induced tanning bed phase, I became sick of laying in other peoples sweat/dead skin cells and feeling my contacts glue themselves to my eyes from the bed's rays. Being too cool/busy to swim in the summers, my skin was quickly growing accustomed to this new shade of white.

I once read an article about skincare where the question of true skin color was posed..."What is my natural skin color? What color should my skin be?" And the answer was, "The color of your backside." I kid you not. It makes sense that your (hopefully) unexposed skin is your intended shade, and that has been my motto ever since. And if you don't like it, you can kiss my pasty white-...everything, I guess.

Now I embrace it. I have "enhanced" red hair (ok, fine, I dye it), and am a sunscreen devotee. I figure as long as I'm not intentially scorching my skin, I might as well go the whole 9 yards and embrace it, and also embrace the daily sunscreen routine that I am almost sure I'll be thankful for in 10+ years.

Sure, my shade is a running joke for most of my friends, but a large portion of the jokes are made by yours truly. Truth is, while sometimes I long for tan skin, it's not enough to log the hours in the sun or put my health in danger. One of my favorite anecdotes to share is the one where I was singing a duet with my roommate for her senior show, and I appeared onstage next to her in a black dress (short, lots of leg and lots of skin). As soon as the lights hit me, our mutual voice teacher yelled, "Stop! Stop! Erin...your legs are SHOCKINGLY white." And said as if I had all at once overwhelmed/stunned/amazed her at the sheer whiteness of my legs, and would you please buy some nylons before the opening? I love that story. But, the real kicker is that that same fair-skinned voice teacher is in her mid to late thirties and still playing teenagers in shows! Granted, she's pushing it a bit and it's opera, but STILL!!



So, here's to all my dainty-dermis'd dames! We shall have the last laugh and look hot doing it!

(No offense to my tan sistas, I'm not-so-secretly jealous of your ability to change skin color...you're fabulous too!)

14. HAVING FAIR SKIN MAKES ME HAPPY. IT MAKES ME FEEL DIFFERENT, SMART AND JUST A LITTLE BIT CLASSY.